The joy of owning a complex car in a rural area

S

segxr7

Active LVC Member
Joined
Aug 7, 2006
Messages
145
Reaction score
0
Location
Cumberland
I'm getting really fed up with living in the boonies.. I took my '95 Mark VIII in for inspection. As I saw the mechanic start to lift up the car, I ran over and asked if he had shut off the air suspension. "Oh..yeah..I didn't think of that." Otherwise the inspection went well (or so I thought at the time); I just needed new front rotors.

I picked up new rotors on the way home. I went to remove the wheels, and noticed that the inside of the locking lugnut key was cracked. I tried to use it, and the key just disintegrated. It seems that the mechanic used it with an air wrench set to about a million lb/ft.

No problem, I thought, I'll just take it to the dealer. Hah..

Lincoln dealer #1: It took me 5 minutes to explain that the lug nuts are fine; the *key* is broken. Only for them to inform me that they don't have any keys.

Ford dealer #1: "A Lincoln what? You mean a Town Car?" They told me that not only do they not have a master key set, but such a thing does not exist in the first place. Uh huh..

Ford dealer #2: They had a master set, but some--including the one for my car--were missing.

Ford dealer #3: "Sorry, we lost our '95 keys in the flood of '96."

It's absolutely mind-boggling that out of four dealerships, EVERY SINGLE ONE is so inept that they can't even take the freaking wheels off! I can't even fathom what would happen if I took the car in for a real problem. It's like living in "Green Acres", only with a '95 Mark VIII rather than a '64 Continental. :p
 
Sorry to hear that. Its a PITA in the city as well, if that helps.

I like how you put the Mark VIII and '64 continental in the same sentence though.
 
segxr7 said:
I'm getting really fed up with living in the boonies.. I took my '95 Mark VIII in for inspection. As I saw the mechanic start to lift up the car, I ran over and asked if he had shut off the air suspension. "Oh..yeah..I didn't think of that." Otherwise the inspection went well (or so I thought at the time); I just needed new front rotors.

I picked up new rotors on the way home. I went to remove the wheels, and noticed that the inside of the locking lugnut key was cracked. I tried to use it, and the key just disintegrated. It seems that the mechanic used it with an air wrench set to about a million lb/ft.

No problem, I thought, I'll just take it to the dealer. Hah..

Lincoln dealer #1: It took me 5 minutes to explain that the lug nuts are fine; the *key* is broken. Only for them to inform me that they don't have any keys.

Ford dealer #1: "A Lincoln what? You mean a Town Car?" They told me that not only do they not have a master key set, but such a thing does not exist in the first place. Uh huh..

Ford dealer #2: They had a master set, but some--including the one for my car--were missing.

Ford dealer #3: "Sorry, we lost our '95 keys in the flood of '96."

It's absolutely mind-boggling that out of four dealerships, EVERY SINGLE ONE is so inept that they can't even take the freaking wheels off! I can't even fathom what would happen if I took the car in for a real problem. It's like living in "Green Acres", only with a '95 Mark VIII rather than a '64 Continental. :p
Click to expand...

well im sure if you traveled over to pettycoat junction, the girls there would be able to help you out.
 
wow, the flood of 96, I guess it must have also destroyed all their phones so they were unable to call up Ford and restock their dealership.
 
Calabrio said:
...is it the lugnuts that are too complex?
Click to expand...

A few weeks ago I went to the Ford dealer (the same one that lost their keys in the flood), to have them do the 1-2 accumulator upgrade. Based on what I've read on these forums, the TSB, and all the cops/old people with Crown Vics, I thought they'd be very familiar with it.

Instead, the parts counter guy gave me a dumbfounded look and said it sounded like something in the air conditioner rather than the transmission. The service manager insisted that they would have to drop the valve body to replace it--after asking me where it's located.

So to answer your question, anything that wasn't present on a 1950 Chevy is too complex. It's downright surreal sometimes; I have no idea how anyone gets their car fixed around here!
 
Well I live in the boonies too but our gear head here do have a clue... Dealerships usually hire Autozone flunkies... LOL...

What'cha need it a good set of wrenches and do the work yourself... I would never have done what I've been doing if it wasn't for the great members of LvC. I'm a 45 year old gear head rookie and having a blast learning how to tear apart my Mark VIII's... Oh it also helps to get the Big Green Bible (Mark VIII shop manuals. That's what the idiots at your Ford Stealership would use to fix your Mark VIII. If they can do it so can you...
 
You're definitely right about that, mespock.. I usually do my own work, but I was hoping to just pay someone to do the 1-2 upgrade rather than lying on my back wrestling with springs and a snap ring while tranny fluid is dripping in my face. However that's certainly better than letting any of those dolts near my car! I wish there was some other way to remove the lug nuts without being dependent on them. I could pound a socket over it, but I'm worried about damaging the stud/wheel/bearings in the process.
 
There have been others who have had the same problem of not having the Key.

Maybe they'll chime in or start a thread in the Mark VIII forum about not having a lug key. I'm sure you'll get a lot of responce.

Good Luck..
 
I used to work at Discount Tires and people would come in all the time without keys. I've removed them many times, its definetly a pain in the azz. I think there used to be a kit for removing them, but I remember using old sockets as well. Good luck.
 
Wait Huh? The Mechanic Or Shop Guy Looked Stupid,in That Dealership??..(((was It A Like Major Dealership Or Is It Something Like A Backyard Dealership Has Maybe 10 Cars In The Lot))) Like He Didnt Knoow...lol..what Kinda Training Does Ford Do..i Mean At My Shop-here In Nys They Have To Pass A Test Before Working In Any Major Dearlership..and Get To Even Touch Anyones Car.let Me Say Thats One Place I Would Give My Car To...best To Get It Right Here!
I Think We Here Have Become More Experianced On Working With These Cars Then The Mechanic At The Dealers! Isnt That Something!


LOL..GET OUT THE STICKS..LIVE IN NY ..HEHEHEE
 
LSCGODDESS98 said:
LOL..GET OUT THE STICKS..LIVE IN NY ..HEHEHEE
Click to expand...

You'd never get me out of the sticks.. LOL.. I like driving my car at hwy speeds... and not after a 2 hour wait in traffic to get out of the city.:eek:

I have to laugh everytime I go to Chicago and watch the traffic.:D

I'd rather challenge deer than sit in traffic.:p
 
Well, I haven't lost to the deer they are on my side..

If it wasn't for the deer I would only have a 93 and a 94 Mark VIII. Now I have 3.... One paid for by one Deer... I won deer dead...

As for Insurance... well that's what comp. ins. is for... as long as you don't use it too often during the year.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Members online

No members online now.
Total: 159 (members: 0, guests: 159)
Back
Top