Funny Political Quotes Free-for-all

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fossten

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Okay, guys, let's have some fun. Libs, repubs, indys, whatever you are, get in on this. We want everybody to post the funniest quotes of any and all public figures through the years.

The only rule is that it has to be either about politics or from a political figure. Members of the media are included.

Let's all have some multipartisan laughs!

"I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the law."
David Dinkins, New York City Mayor.
 
"I'm not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. We are the president."
Hillary Clinton.
 
"They said today this will be a life changing experience for President Clinton. And it is, it does change your life. The doctors told him, from now on, lay off the fat, and he said, 'Look, I haven't seen her in years.'" -—Jay Leno
 
" I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts. " - Will Rogers
 
It's a damn poor mind that can only think of one way to spell a word.
--Andrew Jackson 7th U.S. President
 
"When you have them by the balls, their hearts and minds will follow".

LBJ (?)
 
" During my wervice in the United States Congress, I took the iniative in creating the Internet. " - Vice President Al gore
 
"Let me be very clear about this. Steroids ought to be banned from baseball."— George Bush - Washington, D.C., Oct. 4, 2005
 
"I think it's important to bring somebody from outside the system, the judicial system, somebody that hasn't been on the bench and, therefore, there's not a lot of opinions for people to look at." —George Bush On the nomination of Harriet Miers to the Supreme Court, Washington, D.C., October 4, 2005
 
"We look forward to hearing your vision, so we can more better do our job. That's what I'm telling you."—George Bush - Gulfport, Miss., Sept. 20, 2005.
 
"My thoughts are, we're going to get somebody who knows what they're talking about when it comes to rebuilding cities."—George Bush - On how the rebuilding of New Orleans might commence, Biloxi, Miss., Sept. 2, 2005
 
"And Brownie, you're doing a heck of a job."—George Bush - To FEMA director Mike Brown who resigned 10 days later amid criticism over his job performance.—Mobile, Ala., Sept. 2, 2005
 
"Out of the rubbles of Trent Lott's house—he's lost his entire house—there's going to be a fantastic house. And I'm looking forward to sitting on the porch." —George Bush - Mobile, Ala., Sept. 2, 2005
 
"The best place for the facts to be done is by somebody who's spending time investigating it."—George Bush - Expressing hope that the probe into how CIA agent Valerie Plame's identity was leaked will yield answers, Washington D.C., July 18, 2005
 
"I think younger workers—first of all, younger workers have been promised benefits the government—promises that have been promised, benefits that we can't keep. That's just the way it is."—George Bush - Washington, D.C., May 4, 2005
 
"See, in my line of work you got to keep repeating things over and over and over again for the truth to sink in, to kind of catapult the propaganda."—George Bush - Greece, N.Y., May 24, 2005

(and you guys say he's not in on it...lol)
 
"Well, we've made the decision to defeat the terrorists abroad so we don't have to face them here at home. And when you engage the terrorists abroad, it causes activity and action."—George Bush - Washington, D.C., April 28, 2005

(Action and activity here on our soil)
 
"It's in our country's interests to find those who would do harm to us and get them out of harm's way."—George Bush - Washington, D.C., April 28, 2005

(Aww...how sweet...George realizes he has to protect the terrorists to keep his job!)
 
"We look forward to analyzing and working with legislation that will make—it would hope—put a free press's mind at ease that you're not being denied information you shouldn't see."— George Bush - Washington, D.C., April 14, 2005
 
"I'm going to spend a lot of time on Social Security. I enjoy it. I enjoy taking on the issue. I guess, it's the Mother in me." —George Bush - Washington D.C., April 14, 2005
 
"I believe that, as quickly as possible, young cows ought to be allowed to go across our border."—George Bush - Ottawa, Nov. 30, 2004

Soooo...he's prejudiced? He's all for young cows coming in from the north, but not workers coming from the south?
 
"After standing on the stage, after the debates, I made it very plain, we will not have an all-volunteer army. And yet, this week—we will have an all-volunteer army. Let me restate that."—George Bush - Daytona Beach, Fla., Oct. 16, 2004
 
"Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB/GYN's aren't able to practice their love with women all across the country."—George Bush - Sept. 6, 2004, Poplar Bluff, Mo.

Obviously loves his namesake...
 
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