I was lucky enough to have lottery number 79 the year they went to 70. I am sorry it took us the years it did to understand and empathize with all who survived that horrific tableau, only to be marginalized when returning. I had four friends die, and my method of coping was to attempt denial. Didn't work. I have learned to honor their memory by being the friend to the survivors I was to the deceased. Good luck to you. How can I help?