wow, just wow.
it aint everyday that I am just speechless.
on second though, even though we have no clue what you are actually talking about, you are driving an LS after all...
I would start by replacing that broken coolant pipe that you know is broke, if you cant reach it, then pay someone who can. while your at it, go ahead an replace anything plastic in your cooling system that you haven't already replaced, they are probably about due...
next as Joe mentioned, your DCCV is probably bad and in need of a replacement.
sounds like you also need a new DATC, did the dealer really tell you that they couldn't get/find one and that you would have to go aftermarket? (i didn't even know there was an aftermarket option...) I would buy used before buying a aftermarket unit.
also that weird problem where it feels like the trans doesn't know when to ****, isnt a problem with your trans, you need a new set of coils and plugs...
also that clunking noise coming from the front means that you need new anti-sway bar bushings.
im sure there are more that im forgetting about but that should at least get you started.