car won't start, and horn honking

jrand said:
...
Long story short, PCM does the same type of calculation the advanced battery checkers do where it can give you an ambient air temp at which your vehicle wont have enough CCA's to turn over. it uses the same sensor it does to turn on your heated wipers.

my ambient air temp sensor might be bad, but i think most are semi-inaccurate in the sun or anywhere near a cold draft (ie. park your car in the sun for 8 hrs and jump in, car says its 125 outside for a min or two when its really 84).
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It absolutely does not!
Battery voltage falls with cold. That's where the problem is. A cold battery puts less out.
I gave up on the other thread, and I give up on this one too. Ignore list for you...
 
joegr said:
It absolutely does not!
Battery voltage falls with cold. That's where the problem is. A cold battery puts less out.
I gave up on the other thread, and I give up on this one too. Ignore list for you...
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Lol its ok Joegr... We will probably troll him out of here sometime soon
 
lol the car had 12.5 volts and it would start. i just told you it had voltage and cca's to do cold starts x3 back-back-back. used 4 different battery testers bc it made no sense. there no way to prove this one tho its not written anywhere in the manual or the pced. i would fedex the battery to you but would probably accuse me of shipping a diff battery lol. youre wrong on the other thread too, that tranny procedure is all over almost every diagnostic procedure in the ls manual and the pced manual for 05. i cant and wont speak for a gen 1. that op's car was an 04.

you should 4 real calm down and open your mind to the fact that maybe your car does some stuff you dont understand, even when you turn it off
 
jrand said:
lol the car had 12.5 volts and it would start. i just told you it had voltage and cca's to do cold starts x3 back-back-back. used 4 different battery testers bc it made no sense. there no way to prove this one tho its not written anywhere in the manual or the pced. i would fedex the battery to you but would probably accuse me of shipping a diff battery lol. youre wrong on the other thread too, that tranny procedure is all over almost every diagnostic procedure in the ls manual and the pced manual for 05. i cant and wont speak for a gen 1. that op's car was an 04.

you should 4 real calm down and open your mind to the fact that maybe your car does some stuff you dont understand, even when you turn it off
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Just by the way, Joegr is pretty much considered the mechanical authority on the LS on this forum. He's probably helped more people fix their cars then anyone else. I would really be careful when doubting what he says. And any straight up insults won't be taken well by any of us
 
jrand said:
... your heated windshield wipers work you crackheads ... wait i shouldn't challenge yall on this one,'dumbing things down' is a task yall might be able to excel at...
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I'll give ya something to excel at !!!

Go run with sharp scissors in rush hour traffic somewhere, you fool !!!
 
jrand is right.

Last time the battery started going in the LS, some bitch jumped out of the trunk and started yelling .....pop that pop that pop that
 
jrand said:
you should 4 real calm down and open your mind to the fact that maybe your car does some stuff you dont understand, even when you turn it off
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as there is no reservoir for magic in the car, and the manual kinda skipped over than part, I will prefer to stick to science and experience. first off, it the car was really trying to warn you of something, it would have to be in the manual otherwise, no body would have a clue what the hell the car is trying to warn them of. second, I get that being a member for less than a month, you really dont know yet who the members are that absolutely with out a doubt know more about every single system in this car than you do, so let me save you a lot of time, Joe is one of those guys.

jrand said:
i agree with the person who said it is also a 'symptom'
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so wait, you seem to be confused, which is it? a symptom or a feature? it cant be both


jrand said:
it baffled me until i finally bought a battery about a yr before i needed to.
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the reason that you are baffled, is because you dont understand how electronics work, dont worry, its not the important part of the story, the important part, is that you didn't replace your battery a year early, you replaced it a little too late, even you agreed that it was a symptom, well you cant have a symptom with out a problem. interesting enough that the problem was solved by replacing a battery an entire year before it needed to be replaced.

lets just say we are all on crack, and this is actually a feature that was designed into the system by the engineers, why would it tell you that the battery needs to be replaced an entire year before it needed to be replaced??? because your full of it, and just resorting to making stories up. however I will be in the need for more stories in the following weeks as the new season of Dallas is now over.


jrand said:
youve never heard of it bc its a pretty tough feature to sell on a spec sheet.
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now your just high, if that was a feature, it would be the easiest feature to sell!

customer: how do i know when it is time to change the battery?

salesman: the car will tell you.

customer: oh thats good to know, makes me all warm and fuzzy

it is not because "the alarm will start going of randomly at night about a year or so before it needs to be replaced..."




on a side note, can you please tell me which university you got your engineering degree from? I just want to know what diploma mill I should cut a check to so that I can just buy a PHD, gaining knowledge the other way is just too damn hard...


in the end, it is much more valuable to our members who start threads seeking help if we stick to facts and keep the asshattery to a minimum, and dont bullsh!t up answers for them.
 
1LoudLS said:
as there is no reservoir for magic in the car, and the manual kinda skipped over than part, I will prefer to stick to science and experience. first off, it the car was really trying to warn you of something, it would have to be in the manual otherwise, no body would have a clue what the hell the car is trying to warn them of. second, I get that being a member for less than a month, you really dont know yet who the members are that absolutely with out a doubt know more about every single system in this car than you do, so let me save you a lot of time, Joe is one of those guys.

so wait, you seem to be confused, which is it? a symptom or a feature? it cant be both


the reason that you are baffled, is because you dont understand how electronics work, dont worry, its not the important part of the story, the important part, is that you didn't replace your battery a year early, you replaced it a little too late, even you agreed that it was a symptom, well you cant have a symptom with out a problem. interesting enough that the problem was solved by replacing a battery an entire year before it needed to be replaced.

lets just say we are all on crack, and this is actually a feature that was designed into the system by the engineers, why would it tell you that the battery needs to be replaced an entire year before it needed to be replaced??? because your full of it, and just resorting to making stories up. however I will be in the need for more stories in the following weeks as the new season of Dallas is now over.


now your just high, if that was a feature, it would be the easiest feature to sell!

customer: how do i know when it is time to change the battery?

salesman: the car will tell you.

customer: oh thats good to know, makes me all warm and fuzzy

it is not because "the alarm will start going of randomly at night about a year or so before it needs to be replaced..."




on a side note, can you please tell me which university you got your engineering degree from? I just want to know what diploma mill I should cut a check to so that I can just buy a PHD, gaining knowledge the other way is just too damn hard...


in the end, it is much more valuable to our members who start threads seeking help if we stick to facts and keep the asshattery to a minimum, and dont bullsh!t up answers for them.
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I lol'd a few times
 
go back and read. youre wrong everywhere but here: "in the end, it is much more valuable to our members who start threads seeking help if we stick to facts and keep the asshattery to a minimum, and dont bullsh!t up answers for them."

i have been reading some stuff on here since 2010. defnitely dropped off when i got 2nd hand factory service manuals. just now started to have problems that were not in a book, (cosmetic stuff) thus got a handle and started posting. so i have read many of joegr's posts and i know that he is probably the closest thing to an LS encyclopedia around these parts. i have used a few different things posted by him in the past and i thank him for his contributions. however he has wrongly jumped in my sh!t twice in a short span: first time he was without a doubt wrong, he even went as far as to accuse me of lying when i said i was qouting the manual, haha i thought that pretty priceless, bc I am sure he has a manual for his gen 2 tranny and could have done a simple search, but anyways, joegr knows a lot about ls, but at the same time, he isnt christ jesus and he doesnt know everything about ls. no one does, no one ever will. im not tryin to knock the guy off the pedestal yall have put him on, bc frankly he deserves it compared to the lack of anything remotely helpful that some people have contributed. i just gave a thoroughly tested scenario and my result of said scenario, coupled with a verbal confirmation from a lincoln employee when i point-blank asked about it.

so when it comes to keeping everything in here tried and true, i specifcally stated that even if your battery is still decent when you get the symptoms described, youre going to have to get a new one anyways bc the car will reject it. that isnt asshattery, thats a fact. I mean seriously, the guy is trying to tell me that I have bad battery from florida?? I still have it joe, if youre in ohio stop in I bet it still has its charge sittin in my basement for the past 6 mos. there isnt a scientific argument he can make against me from florida until he comes and checks the battery. unless you test your battery multiple times in different temps to assess the systemic functions the way that i have there is no way of knowing what all the fracking pcm is doing when you shut it off. the security system goes bananas is when it thinks its too cold to start per my tests with a decent battery. 99% of ppl do not even have a controlled enough environment to complete a thorough test (a open-faced 6 story garage, with a basement and rapidly fluctuating temps during ohio falls & winters did the trick for me). its ok to not know joegr, theres no way to know bc ford didnt publish any of it. they made a ton of money with faulty features on this car bc there was no way to fix it without taking it to lincoln. its **** like this why this forum exists in the first place. if you were a non-technical person, try to check your battery life: no voltage reading on the dash.f. sealed battery with a window into one cell.f. the ambient temp calculation would be a perfect feature if the sensor was accurate. but its not accurate in many environments. if i parked my car in a sealed residential garage without a draft i am sure i would have got an extra yr out of that battery. oh well, pennies down the drain. Just giving my experience and saving someone in a similar environment the headache or the cash to take it into Lincoln, bc honestly if your battery is testing out and you were still having these exact same symptoms, you would be clueless and thinking you actually had a problem with your security system. The only reason I got a new battery in lieu of taking it to Lincoln was bc I got a new battery for like $80 with a coupon. Figured it was worth a shot compared to what I had read in another forum about this exact problem. My battery would test out but if the car got a reading from the ambient air sensor lower than whatever the calculated threshold for my battery was, it would trip the alarm.

and if you two a_s_s-clowns from ann arbor think i care about osu football just bc im from Columbus youre wasting your time. i hate osu more than both of you combined. GO IRISH
 
jrand said:
lol the car had 12.5 volts and it would start. i just told you it had voltage and cca's to do cold starts x3 back-back-back. used 4 different battery testers bc it made no sense
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In my past life as an ASE cerified mechanic, I have seen batteries that had plenty of voltage, and CCA's. They would pass a load test, although it was on the weak side, (marginal). Battery replacement fixed the customers complaint. The issue was either low water/electrolytes, lead plate decay, or internal shorting. These issues can play he!! on newer vehicles with sensitive elctronics.

Regardless of the heated debate, we all agree on one thing. The OP's battery needs replaced, and he is doing that.

I am now going to fade back into the shadows.......
 
jrand said:
and if you two a_s_s-clowns from ann arbor think i care about osu football just bc im from Columbus youre wasting your time. i hate osu more than both of you combined. GO IRISH
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I'm guessing that part was directed at me lol. Yeah I hate OSU for sure, but trust me, the drunken Irish are in a REAL close second.... and while were name calling.... you fu*king twat waffle
 
ok, u guys are not focusing, some of u, i mean.
Just give you guys an update, the new battery solve the problem, and thanks for remind me that it needs a single vent tube.
Now, anyone ready for the quiz? the ac is making hissing sound every a few minutes, it will hiss for 1 or 2 second. i search the forum and it seem i am low on r134. damn it, crappy ford, the dccv and compressor was replaced 2 yrs ago.
 
I'll have my cookie for being the first to correctly diagnose your issue.
 
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