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Top 10 Reasons to Know You're a Redneck

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Posted by: Joeychgo

Top 10 Reasons to Know You're a Redneck

1. Your dog rides in your truck more than your wife.
2. You wear specific hats to farm sales, livestock auctions, customer appreciation suppers, and vacations.
3. You have ever had to wash off in the backyard with a garden hose before your wife would let you in the house.
4. You've never thrown away a 5-gallon bucket.
5. You can remember the fertilizer rate, seed population, herbicide rate and yields on a farm you rented 10 years ago, but cannot recall your wife's birthday.
6. You have used a velvet leaf plant as toilet paper.
7. You have driven off the road while examining your neighbors crops.
8. You have borrowed gravel from the county road to fill potholes in your driveway.
9. You have buried a dog and cried like a baby.
10. You've used the same knife to make bull calves steers and peel apples.

Posted by: 1wykdmk8

A few more:

You think Sherlock Holmes is a housing project down in Biloxi.

You think a stock tip is advice on worming' your hogs.

You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.

You think TACO BELL is the Mexican Phone Company.

Your state's got a new law that says when a couple get divorced, they are still legally brother and sister.

Your house still has the "WIDE LOAD" sign on the back.

You got stopped by a state trooper. He asked you if you had an I.D. And you said, 'Bout What?'

You think Genitalia is an Italian airline.

N on
A thletic
S port
C reated
A round
R ednecks

You carried a fishing pole into Sea World.

Taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen.

Your grandfather died and left everything to his widow. But she can't touch it until she's fourteen.

The people on Jerry Springer's show remind you of your neighbors, and quite possibly are.

Posted by: mespock

Second set even better Love it!!!

Espcially when you live in the world of Rednecks.

Ahhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!

Have you even seen someone so ignorant!!!

(Bryan doesn't count)

Posted by: Jibit

Quote:

Originally Posted by mespock

(Bryan doesn't count)

Posted by: caddyshack17901

If you mow your lawn and find a car

you think mutual funds is where everyone is having a good time

you have ever driven your tractor to your friend's house to drink because your car is broken

Posted by: Bob Hubbard

You think "Manual Labor" is a Puerto Rican

Posted by: codewize

I agree. Second set better. Very funny

Posted by: caddyshack17901

If you know what a "commode" is, you are redneck

Posted by: mespock

Ricer for a Redneck